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You find something you like—maybe you’re a Facebook fan, or a loyal Instagrammer, or a member of the cool Snapchat club—and you stick to it. Ever wonder if you’ve met your soulmate, but didn’t know it?

But no results to speak of past a few coffee first dates. I’ve had plenty of time to think about what the problem might be, and a good deal of that energy focused on the perfectly valid question of “what’s wrong with me?

” Back when I was more successful on the relationship scene I was, after all, a bit younger, and I’ve had to entertain the uncomfortable possibility that 50 year-old Sam is simply less marketable than 30 year-old Sam. For one thing, I’m just not Outdoorsy Guy, but I live in the middle of Outdoorsy Nation.

Also, I’m picky as hell (when you’re educated to the doctoral level, for instance, you’re going to be looking for someone with significant intelligence).

And there are plenty of things about me guaranteed to cause daily match surfers to lunge for the “next” button – as in, we know that a substantial percentage of American women don’t find bald guys attractive, period. Since there’s nothing I can do about some of these things (short of leaving Denver and joining Hair Club), I decided to go straight at the issue as best I could. Here’s how I began: The great thing about Match is the chance to meet women I might never encounter otherwise.

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